Bittersweet
by HPfan1952
Summary: Life doesn't always go as we planned and all we can do is hope for the best and work with what we have been given. What happens when Castle's best made plans don't go as expected.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Don't own them :(**

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"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.  
Delicious Ambiguity."  
―Gilda Radner

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_Kate juggled the tiny velvet box in her hands and tried to keep the shattering heartache from flooding her voice. "You can't..." she started, a deep ragged breath the only barrier to the sob trying to make it to the surface. "You can't ask me if you don't," she paused, the final words catching in her throat, ''if you don't wake up," she finished quickly, hoping the small twinge of humor would keep her sane; a small piece of him she needed to hold onto._

_She took a step forward and raised her eyes from the box to the face before her, hoping to find a classic smirk and a twinkling eye looking back at her, perhaps even a bandaged hand reaching out to take the small black box to do just that, but his features remained still, and his hand stayed at his side._

_Kate turned her attention back to the object in her hands, running her thumb over the course fabric, as the first signs of her broken resolve trailed down her cheek. Taking a seat on the side of the bed, she reached out for the still hand and tucked the jewelry box into his palm, closing his fingers around it._

_''I love you," she continued softly, holding the closed fist in both of her hands. "But, I guess you already knew that," she added, running a finger over his knuckles. "Just like you to get ahead of it all."_

_Kate returned her focus on the quiet face, feeling the tears starting anew. ''Damn it, Rick, I'm not the one who is supposed to be using humor right now, that's your coping mechanism." Her voice broke and she dropped her gaze back to her hands, shivering as a tear dropped onto her skin. Leaning forward she kissed his lips, placing every ounce of hope she held into it. ''Please," she whispered, placing a second tender kiss. "Please...please pull through, Rick. Please, don't leave me here alone." She lowered her head gently under his chin and curled up as best she could beside him, avoiding any possible harm she could cause._

_Closing her eyes, she tried to drift asleep to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. Her heart splintered and broke as sobs wracked her thin frame. No arm wrapped about her, no gentle murmur met her ear. She buried her face into his chest, crying, cursing, pleading. Tears soaked her cheeks, her hair, the material beneath her. She gripped the cloth of the hospital gown into her fists as her shoulders shook, an attempt to muffle her cries with the thin cotton fabric._

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**24 Hours earlier-**

The room was still, the only sounds filling the spaces were the even strokes of fingers against a keyboard and the occasional honk of a car from the streets below. Moonlight filtered in through the study through the window. Stretching slightly stiff muscles, Castle turned his attention from the computer screen to the silent figure propped up amongst the cushions, her head lulled to the side in a deep sleep, the book she'd been reading flopped open on the seat beside her. He smiled quietly to himself as he pushed back his chair, saved his current chapter, closed the laptop, and made his way to the couch. He paused at the slight ache at the back of his skull, wincing against the pressure until it subsided as quickly as it had come. Shaking it off, he continued forward and knelt before the slumbering form.

Castle gently eased his arms beneath Kate and slowly lifted her from the cushions, cradling her against his chest, wincing at the loud thud as the book met the floor. Opening a single eye, he watched for any signs of wakefulness in her face and breathed a sigh of relief as she barely shifted in his arms. With practiced precision he carefully pulled himself back to his feet and started for his room, doing his best to keep from jostling her as he crossed the threshold and made for her side of the bed. He placed her upon the covers and slowly worked to get her under the blankets. He bent low, brushed aside a loose strand of hair from her face, and placed a soft kiss upon her temple, lingering long enough to drink in all that was her. "I love you."

Returning to the study, he picked the book up off the ground and returned it to the shelf before heading to turn out the light. He stopped at the edge of his desk and reached for the top drawer, casting a glance up at the doorway before pulling it open and digging around a dozen or so mini notebooks and multiple pens, seeking the small square object in the back. Removing his hand he held up the velvet ring box and opened it, casting another quick glance at the door. A single day more and it would be hers. Until then, no one would know it existed…except for him, and maybe their closest family and friends with whom he'd been planning and plotting this for the last few weeks.

He smiled, imagining the details of his grand scheme as he removed the simple yet elegant ring from its silk bed and watched the light play off the single diamond at its heart. It was perfect; he would invite Kate to an "impromptu" dinner date on their anniversary. He would take her out to dinner and dancing at the restaurant he had booked a month ago. And, as he kept her attentions solely on him, their friends and family would slowly trickle into the shadows of the tables around them. Once one the waiters secretly signaled everyone had arrived, he'd pluck up the courage, get down on one knee and ask the love of his life to be his wife. After which, his dreams coming true, their "impromptu" dinner would become the engagement party it was meant to be all along.

Castle returned the ring to its box and returned the box to its hiding place, his hands shaking as he closed the drawer. He took in a deep breath, his heart already hammering away as if he stood before her right now. Rubbing his moist palms against his robe, he tried to calm his nerves but instead found himself picturing her smiling face beaming down at him as he placed that ring on her hand. His heart beat jumped up a notch and he was forced to swallow and count backwards from ten. Hastily turning out the light, he returned to the bedroom and carefully climbed into bed, inching slowly next to her. He gently wrapped his arm around her and snuggled in close, his heart finding rest in her presence. She turned in her sleep and snuggled even closer, burying her face into his neck and sending his heart into an overflow of warmth. He kissed the top of her head and closed his eyes, grateful for the woman in his arms.

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A/N: I'm baaaaaaaack, again, lol. Just wanted to give a big thank you to my newest beta Dmarx. You're help has been much appreciated :) You totally rock :) And, a big thank you to all my readers you guys totally rock, too :)

Until, next chapter. Happy reading


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Wish I owned them, then I might have enough money to go to college full-time without having to worry about loans :(

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**A/N:** I just wanted to say a big, big thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, followed and favorited in the last ten hours since I first posted this story. You guys have really made my day an awesome one. It was a treat for me at work when I went for break or my lunch to check my emails and find a bunch of new messages waiting for me :) So without further ado from me here is my thank you to you guys for seriously making this day a better one :)

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Kate stretched out her limbs, the faint scent of bacon and eggs assailing her senses as she took in a deep breath. She drew back the covers and dropped her feet to the floor, casting a quick glance at the bathroom door before deciding to temporarily postpone the shower. Crossing to the study, she paused in the threshold, a wistful smile winding its way onto her features as she considered how familiar it had become to cross these rooms over the last year. Her thoughts flowing with her as she continued on towards the living area, she let her gaze roam the living space, realizing how much like home it all was to her. She wound her way around the furniture, she felt her wistful smile widen as her attentions fell on the man behind the counter, his own attentions fully focused upon the task of making a buffet sized breakfast.

She felt the warmth rise into her skin as Castle's gaze lifted to find her, his eyes glossing over with desire and the spatula frozen mid pancake flip in his hand suggesting his sudden shift in mind set. Biting her lip, she purposefully let her eyes drop away to the floor and rounded the counter, coming within an inch of his frame. Snatching a piece of bacon from a nearby plate, she took a small bite from the end and finally met his eyes.

"It seems something big is happening today," she stated simply, surveying the already huge spread of food items before returning to his gaze. "Mind if I join in?" She asked, returning the bacon to its plate and bringing herself flush against him, palms resting flat upon his chest.

His arms wrapped about her middle, pulling her closer as his lips found hers. He ghosted over the tender flesh, barely nipping at her as if savoring the very feel. Her smile widened and she felt his adoration slip to desire, his need to taste welcomed as she parted her lips for him. The small of her back hit the counter as his hunger took over, turning her beating heart into a hum of activity. She felt his hands dance against her sides and along her back, bunching, shifting, lifting the cloth of her shirt. His mouth moved on down to her neck, leaving a trail of fire behind it. She felt as his hands shifted from their exploration of her frame to their full downward descent and shivered as the tips of his fingers crossed the boundary between the hem of her shirt and the bare flesh of her legs.

"Easy Casanova," Kate admonished, her voice betraying her as she arrested the upward ascent of his playful fingers. "Feed me, first," she added, answering the question in his glazed eyes. "Then a bit of fun," she continued. She glanced over his shoulder. "Your pancakes are burning."

She bit back a laugh as his entire frame of mind changed in an instant as he flew back to the stove and removed the smoking pan from the burner. "You really are trying to set the place on fire today aren't you," she laughed. She crossed to the stove, rested a hand on his shoulder, and kissed him on the cheek. "Happy Anniversary, Rick."

Castle turned his head to stare at her. "Happy Anniversary, Kate." He smiled back, wrapping a single arm about her and kissing her cheek in return. Brushing aside her hair, he whispered into her ear, lacing her blood with aching flames. "And technically that was your fault, oh woman who teases me so."

His touch jolted her in place. She watched him turn back to face the counter, pan in hand, smirk glowing on his features, ready to re-start the pancakes as if he had not just left her craving more. She tried to glower and fell short, earning an even smugger look from him. Taking a deep breath, she calmed the rage in her veins and started back to take a seat, plotting sweet, sweet revenge as she kept her eyes on the man working away at the counter once more. She rested her head on her arms and felt the gentler warmth return as he looked up at her, the smugness gone, replaced with the light and mirth and love in his eyes.

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The smell of hundreds of flowers assaulted his nose the instant he stepped in from the sidewalk, their various shades and hues filling every corner of the flower shop. Castle quickly observed every floral arrangement, his mind running an endless loop of last minute check lists, ensuring that every last nuance had been met. New suit. Check. Made sure friends and family remembered the time for the hundredth time. Check. Called to make sure the restaurant did not lose reservation. Check. Purchase a dozen fresh red roses. In the process. Purchase packages of rose petals and oils…His mind shifted gears, focusing on the image of soft skin, water and…

His hip hit the edge of the counter, startling him out of his thoughts. He turned to the old woman behind the register and opened his mouth to speak.

"Roses for a special occasion," she answered for him. "Engagement, I'd wager, or I'm completely losing my touch." She raised a finger to stop his curiosity. "Only men who are buying roses for an engagement dinners seem to run into old Granny's counter. Always lost in their nerves. And, other musings," she added with a chuckle. "I have just what you need. I create special bouquets every morning for occasions such as this. I'll be right back."

He watched the old woman shuffle away to the back room, his mind trying to process what just happened. His phone buzzed once in his pocket. Pulling it out, he softly chuckled at her message.

**The 'boys' seem to be grumbling about you nagging them like an old hen and that they get that they need to be there by 8. What on Earth did you do? Be where by 8?**

Castle prepared to reply, a quiet chuckle on his lips as he thought of a quick dodge.

"Here you go." The old woman called his attention from the text. She held up a hand before he could ask about the flowers she carried in her hand. "No, I am not blind. And, yes I know I only have a single red rose in amongst eleven white. I can tell you're a man who might know a thing or two about symbolism, so you just remember when you give these to her to tell her she's the one and the only one." She stopped him mid purchase with another raised hand. "On the house." she handed him the flowers and started to scoot him out the door. "Now go on. You have more important things to do than hear the musings of an old woman. Good luck to you and whatever you do, try not to drop that ring."

He found himself outside the flower shop, bouquet in one hand, wallet and phone in the other, his mind at a loss. Turning to wave his thanks, he found the old woman was heading back to back room with a slight spring to her step, as if he had made her day.

Taking a final glance at the interior space, he noticed the black and white photo of a young couple on their wedding day, giving out free flowers to all who passed by their shop. A small sign nearby stated simply: _You can put a price on many things but, you can never put a price on love._

Turning back, he climbed into the waiting cab, his worries eased by a little old woman who knew exactly what had been needed. Looking down at the flowers in his hand, he was reminded of the most important thing; his love for Kate. And that even if nothing went as planned that night, nothing would ever change the fact that she was the one and that he wanted to ask her to marry him.

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**A/N:** Another big thank you, as noted above, you all really made my day :) I hope this chapter two has lived up to expectations.

Until next chapter, Happy reading :)


	3. Chapter 3

Kate stepped from the shower and felt through the steam for the towel resting on the edge of the sink. Gripping the cloth with both hands, she proceeded to dry off, her mind trying its hardest to flood her thoughts with the images of that morning's shower and subsequent towel off which had turned to anything but one. She felt the blood run hot in her veins. Shaking her head, she quickly wrapped the towel about her and opened the door to her room, letting the shift in temperature snap her focus back to the task at hand. She made a beeline for the dress bag on her bed and quickly removed its contents, the dark green satin reaching to the floor as she held the dress in both hands.

Letting the towel drop to the floor, Kate hastily put on her under garments, trying to avoid the images of him peeling them off, warmth creeping back into her skin. Throwing the dress on quickly, she returned to the bathroom in another rush, doing her best to ignore the new images and sensations worming in of the feel of dropping satin over skin, gentle hands, tender kisses…

She gave another shake of her head and turned to her mirror. Her flushed cheeks turned brighter as she beheld her reflection, forcing herself to drop her gaze, half her smile hidden behind a bitten lip. Reaching for her brush, she started in on her hair, the constant motion pulling her thoughts back into the present. She paused at the sudden quiver in her stomach, the chill in her spine raising the hairs at the back of her neck. Taking in a deep breath, she swallowed down the worry, letting the unease filter out of her blood. Chalking it up to nerves, she returned to the task at hand, the brief moment soon pushed from her mind completely as she found focus once more.

Her phone rang in the other room, pulling her attention from her makeup. _Castle_. She rolled her eyes and started for the nightstand to retrieve the device. She clicked the answer button ready to call her man child out on his impatience. _You'll see me in an hour, goofball_. She lifted the phone to her ear and prepared to speak. The tear laced voice halted her in her tracks.

"Alexis? Is everything—?

"Something's…something's happened."

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The clock on the wall seemed incapable of telling time, forever stuck but forever moving on to the following minute. The hours seemed to never pass, as if time wanted to play some sick joke on the anxiously waiting by making them wait in an endless loop. Very few passed by the small little group huddled together in a tight circle, their varied colorful garb making them more like a waiting bridal party than a solemn band of friends sitting in a cold, featureless wing of the emergency room. Small paper cups rested full on the center table, all but forgotten as broken faces awaited some small piece of news, some answer to the unexplainable events just hours earlier. No one moved, no one spoke, save for the soft murmurs of reassurances.

Kate stared at the floor, trying hard to keep the tears at bay for the sake of the family sitting at her side. Tried hard to keep from taking in a deep breath, tried hard to keep from shattering apart, to keep from becoming a mess before everyone present. She felt the tear start to form, swallowed it back, shivered against the cold, felt ill in the antiseptic air. She hugged her jacket closer and took a soft breath in, catching a familiar scent. Her heart clenched as she gave a more detailed look at the outwear she had grabbed in her rush out the door, and realized it was the jacket he had left the week before. She tried not to double over, crawled back into the contours of his coat, hid behind the pretext of another shiver from the non-existent chill. She felt the clasp of a weathered hand over her own and looked up at the solemn yet reassuring face of his Mother.

"Family of—

She nearly scrambled from her seat, heart suddenly finding itself unable to beat until some news was given. She gripped the matriarch's hand in both her own, unable to give up her life line as the doctor took in the waiting faces standing before them. She tried to read the older man's face, tried to glean what she could from his expression. His features remained harder than stone as he finished sizing up the eclectic group, casting a brief glance at her hand before addressing them all.

"I need to speak with immediate family only as of this time."

She tried to drop brack into the crowd, no more his actual immediate family than a stranger down the street, the held back the tear that was once again making its presence known. The iron grip on her hands kept her from moving any further.

"You're his family, too," Martha stated before switching her attention to the doctor as he began listing the regulations and rules. "And, she is going to be allowed to hear what you have to say or so help me, you'll hear from our lawyers."

The doctor seemed to contemplate the words and her threat, the briefest glimpse of frustration in his eyes before he cast another stone glance Kate's way and nodded his resignation to the fact. He motioned for the three women to follow him down a narrow lifeless hallway and into a back conference room, closing the door behind them and asking them to take a seat. Kate took a seat in a worn oversized chair, its upholstery in need of new cloth; Martha and Alexis took seats to her right. The doctor wound his way around the wide oak table, and dropped into a chair opposite them and folded his hands before him. He took in the smaller group before him, noting each face in turn, his gaze barely noticing Kate before resting his attention on the matriarch.

"We checked for more common reasons from a stroke to a severe heart attack." The doctor took a momentary pause. Kate held her breath, clasping and unclasping her hands together in a silent need-to-do–something motion. "Our preliminary results have come in and there are no indications of any common scenario." She felt her breath release.

"So he'll be okay." The words left her in a grateful rush. Thankful tears started to form as her clenched muscles began to relax. The doctor turned his attention to her as if he might answer her question, before turning back and continuing as if she had never spoken.

"We will run more extensive tests in the morning. Check for less common explanations." He halted once more and shifted in his seat, leaning over his clasped fingers on the table. "I must beg your forgiveness for my bluntness but, circumstances being as they are, I needed to know; has your son prepared any type of advanced directive? And, has he named a power of attorney? Should he not wake and matters take a turn for the worst—

"What—

The doctor returned his attention to her, the frustration fully evident in his glare. "Miss, one more word and I will have to ask you to leave. His family has been kind enough to grant you the right to hear, but please understand that it is they, not you, who must deal with the medical outcomes. I get the nature of your relationship to the patient and I can only imagine what you must be feeling, but in order to ensure my patient receives the care he has requested I need to hear from his family."

Beside her, she could hear both women start to protest, insisting on her right to speak, asking him to answer her unfinished question. The doctor nodded his resignation and complied, turning back to Kate he straightened his posture.

"Miss Beckett, to answer your question, there is no indication at this time of recovery. Given that we have yet to understand the nature of this sudden comatose state, we have no way of knowing if or when or under what circumstances he will wake up. And it is highly likely that he may never wake. Now, as it seems my hand has been forced to disclose this to you and I can see the harshness of my words has upset his family. I ask that you leave this room. Go home, get some rest. Dawn may yet show to be a miracle."

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**A/N:** Wow, seems that doctor missed a Kubler-Ross seminar O_o The other thing this chapter proved, there was another use to having to learn about and create my own advanced directive for my ethics class.

Another big thank you to all my readers and to my beta, as always you guys totally rock :)

Until, the next chapter, happy reading :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:….Nope, still don't own them.**

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She needed to move, to do something, or she would collapse where she stood. Kate started with the desk, the objects upon it set asunder by the paramedics in their rush to save his life. She lost herself to the task, holding back the tears and the bitter cold with the constant arranging and re-arranging of picture frames, pens and papers. She kept her eyes glued to the wood and various items, avoiding the space between desk and couch, the spot where he had collapsed. The tremor gripped her heart, squeezed it until it ached, punched the wind from her lungs. She bowed her head and forced back the tears, gripping the edge of the desk in her hands until her knuckles turned white with strain. She wiped at her eyes and took several deep breaths, her gaze suddenly falling where she wished it would not.

A single red rose rested amongst a scattering of white roses upon the floor, their petals trampled and crushed. A pillow from the couch lay among the debris, a single indentation where his head had rested as he lay unconscious upon the floor. She swallowed back the pain trying to worm in once more and started to clean up, returning the throw pillow to the couch cushions. She gently gathered the destroyed stalks one by one into her hands, their beautiful scent cloying at her nose. Kate stared down at the innocent things, fighting back a fresh wave of tears, as she beheld the gift meant for her. Getting to her feet, she hesitated over the trash can, her hands unwilling to release their hold upon the broken roses. She closed her eyes and let go, shivering in the cold. Reaching down, she started for the crumpled wrapper and froze.

Her hand trembled as it reached just beneath the edge of the couch and gripped the contours of a small, coarse box. She slowly removed the object, her heart racing with each millimeter forward. She took a stuttering breath at the black jewelry box in her hand, its shape and design suggesting it could contain only one type of jewelry.

"Rick."

Kate dared not open it, some foolish romantic notion wanting to keep that reveal for him alone. She held the box to her heart as she took in a steadying gulp of air, her eyes closed against the onslaught of pain surging into her body. The ring box still tucked close to her, she moved away from the desk, only just realizing that she had been sitting back against it, and returned her weight to her shaky feet.

She made her way to the bedroom in a haze and placed the box on his pillow, staring at the tiny velvet container as if it might disappear if she walked away. She forced herself to change out of her rumpled dress, but relented at turning down the covers, choosing instead to sleep under his jacket, hoping to find comfort in its proximity. Kate snuggled close to his side and rested her head on his pillow, curling up into a tight ball and trying hard not focus on the single fact that just that morning she had woken up to eggs and pancakes and him. Reaching for the ring box, she tucked it close once more and closed her eyes, begging her mind to believe, just believe for one night, that his jacket was his arm, his pillow his shoulder. She tried to sleep, her treacherous thoughts mocking her, her battered heart resting in the gutter listening for the whispered words that would always pull her out and into the light.

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She needed him. Kate rolled over for the final time and pulled herself out of bed. She dressed quickly and quietly, tucking the ring deep into the pocket of her coat as she headed out into living room. She walked softly to the door, doing her best to keep from waking his family, both asleep on the couch, the home phone resting on the coffee table before them. She slipped out into hallway and into the elevator. Heedless of the hour, she started onto the sidewalk, hailing a cab only when her reason assaulted her sense of forward movement. She hugged his coat tighter, opting to avoid seeing the world passing by outside the window by keeping her head bent low. She paid the fare at the ride's end and passed into the waiting area. There was only one place she wanted to be, rules be damned.

The nurse behind the desk recognized her immediately. With only a single glance about her, the young woman checked a chart of patient names and room numbers before motioning for her to follow her. Taking an elevator to the third floor, she led Kate through several different hallways, each full of various amounts of activity. The nurse halted in front of a closed door, her look of true sympathy cutting at the resolve she held over her emotions. Nodding a silent thanks, Kate watched the nurse head back down the hall and disappear around the corner. She reached out for the door knob, her hand falling short as the tremors took hold. She took several deep breaths and tried once more, closing her eyes until she succeeded.

Her heart tried to crush her as she beheld her beloved before her, no warm smile to greet her as she entered. His head and hand were both bandaged from injuries sustained in the fall. Electrodes and wires crisscrossed around his body, each connected to a machine monitoring the function of his heart and brain. She stepped further into the room and felt the trembling move from her hands into the rest of her frame. She dug for the ring box and held it close, casting a quick glance at the door as if the doctor somehow knew she might come and was ready to drag her way. When she saw no one, she returned her attention to the simple object in her hands that would change her life forever. She turned the box in her hands, a plea forming on her lips as her heart squeezed and clenched and writhed in her chest, dragging tears into her eyes.

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**A/N:** And, with that we are now up to the point at which we started. Though, I will stay mum on where it goes from here. Muhahahaha, I know I am mean. But, I will give you one itsy bitsy clue there will be surrealistic imagery coming up.

As always thank you, thank you to my readers :) And, thank you, thank you to Dmarx for reviewing my work :)

Until the next chapter, Happy Reading


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** How 'bout that 100th episode! So much fun! Now that is how you celebrate a TV show's milestone episode!

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_He could hear the voices on the wind, could just make out their words. He turned in the direction he thought they were coming from and found his path blocked by thick vines, their thorns sharp and plentiful. He turned back and met the same blockage, several thorns slashing at his face. A sharp crash of thunder reverberated overhead, forcing him to look up. He could just see the dark purple clouds through the tangled foliage above, could just see the streaks of lightning. Another burst of thunder called out in challenge as the rains began to pelt the leaves. The voices carried in on a fresh burst of air, sending a chill running along his spine as he recognized his daughter's voice and could hear the tears in her pleading words._

_He gripped the vines in both hands, heedless of the thorns cutting into his palm. Pulling away at the bracken, he tore his way through the endless maze. The voices grew louder, the deeper into the brush he pushed until at last he reached the end and fell forward onto an ashen path, the volcanic dust billowing up around him. He strained his ear, listened, but the voice had grown silent the moment he'd broken through. He coughed as a deep breath of air brought the soot around him into his lungs. He got to his hands and knees, the hacking cough wracking his frame. The rain caught up to him, soaking him and the earth in an instant in its deluge. He lifted his head and tried to see past the veil of water only to find a dark, mud-riddled path ahead. _

_He steeled his resolve, desperate to get to his child. He got to his feet and started forward, caring little about the pounding wind and rain trying to slow him down. The temperature dropped, cold seeped in, his drenched frame shivering in the frigid blasts of air. He wrapped his arms around his chest, trying to keep what little warmth he had centered over his heart. Snow started to fall first in light drifts and then in an avalanche from the skies. The world around him turned to a murky, grayish wall. His path started to slope upwards into the heart of the storm, allowing the icy pelts to pepper his face like frozen darts. Lightning struck the road ahead, momentarily blinding him. Seeking footing, he missed stepped and slipped. He dropped to the bottom of the slope, his back hitting hard against a small boulder, sending mind numbing pain into his body._

_He tried to move after the searing pain subsided and managed only a few feet before the weight of fallen snow shoved him back to the ground. Wind beat his face, forcing him to turn his head aside. He tried to claw his way forward, pushed, shoved, scratched until his fingers were numb and his lungs begged for air. A new voice echoed around him, its sound just as familiar. _Kate._ His heart seized up on him, the brokenness of her words rending it in two. He scrambled against the snow building around and over him. His tears froze to his skin as the attempt proved as futile as the first two, his limbs growing weary. He closed his eyes and willed himself not to give in to the dark trying to close in around him._

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Castle woke slowly, cringing against the bright light pouring into the room. He blinked until his eyes adjusted, allowing him to take stock of his situation. He lay in a hospital bed, wires running around his frame from nodes attached to his skin. Kate rested across his chest asleep; eyes puffy and her cheeks streaked with the tale tell stains of fallen tears. His heart twisted at her disheveled appearance, he raised a hand and stroked her hair away from her face before running his thumb gently over her cheek. He shifted the fingers of his free hand and felt the rough texture of crushed velvet. He turned his hand over and spied its contents, momentarily closing his eyes as his chest constricted. "Kate," he breathed. Wrapping his arms gently about her, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, drinking her in, wishing he could have been there to dry her tears.

She began to stir in his arms and he could just see her eyes flutter open. She stared briefly at the far wall before shifting her attention to her waist. She stiffened, rose, turned to face him.

"Rick." His name left her lips in a whispered breath, her features a mixture between relief and disbelief, the shimmer of fresh tears at the corner of her eyes. He cupped the side of her face and the first drops of the silent torrent hit his palm as she leaned into his touch. Castle swiped his thumb over her cheek bone, his heart clenching tighter with each caught tear. She tried to speak, tripped over her words, her tears falling harder. "I love you."

He sat up, brought himself close enough to nuzzle her nose. He hushed her fears, whispering his love as he kissed her cheek, the corner of her lips, her mouth. He massaged the tender flesh, with each pass he made a soft gentle drawn out meeting as quiet proof of his consciousness. Relief flooded through his veins as she finally responded in kind, finally accepted that he was truly awake, that this was not some wicked dream. The kiss quietly deepened, each tasting and savoring and holding to the moment in tender joy. Castle gently pulled away and kissed her forehead, feeling her tremble under the touch of his lips.

Finding her gaze, he soaked in the light he so loved shining back at him. He smiled at her smile, and kissed the tip of her nose before shifting his focus back to the velvet box almost forgotten in his hand. He took in a deep breath of air, as his own trembling started, his heart finding a sudden need to run faster. "I…" he cleared his throat, his mouth running dry as a bone. "This isn't exac... I mean. I um…" He heard a soft snicker and turned his attention back to her. Kate glanced up at him, a soft smile on her lips as she held out a shaking left hand.

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**A/N:** Another big thank you to my readers and my beta, your guys' involvement in this story has really been heartwarming:) I hope you all have enjoyed this little tale as much as I enjoyed writing it and I do have an epilogue coming up, so stay tuned. Again, thanks all around, you all rock :)


	6. Epilogue

**Disclaimer: **Don't own them :(

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**Several days later-**

Water dripped down her skin in warm rivulets as she hunted for her towel amidst the steam. Finding the plush cloth, she toweled off and peeked around the door into the room. Clear. As much as she enjoyed the notion, others were waiting. Kate made her way to the dress laid out on the bed, its blue silk glinting in the light from the bathroom. Casting a fast glance at the doorway separating the bedroom from the study, she hastily dropped the towel and threw on her clothes, shivering as the cool silk slipped over her skin. She checked the doorway again. Still clear. A twinge of fear gripped her spine. She listened for the sound of life, and the soft patter of footsteps echoed in. Her breath released in a rush and she pushed herself to finish getting ready.

He stopped dead as he stepped into the room, his eyes finding hers in an instant. Pink enveloped every portion of exposed skin on her frame as he studied her, took her in, worshipped her from in a frozen stupor. Castle finally broke himself free from his daze and started towards her, one hand hidden behind his back. He halted just before her, his gaze never wavering from hers as he pulled his bandaged hand out from hiding. She took the single red rose he offered, the heat turning up a notch in her cheeks. He found her left hand and brought it to his lips, kissing each knuckle softly, lingering a moment longer as he reached the engagement ring on her finger.

"You look…breathtaking," he murmured against the flesh of her fingers. He stepped closer and kissed her cheek, lingering several moments, the touch of his lips searing through her flesh and into her bones. He pulled back and found her gaze, smiling as the warmth burned in her cheeks and down her neck. "Ready?"

She cast a glance at the closed door separating the study from the loft, the quiet sounds of a small gathering wafting in, and turned back to face him. She raised a gentle hand to the small bandage remaining on his forehead; tenderly pushing back several lose strands of hair from the dressing. "If you are." She ran her fingers down along his face, keeping her gaze on his. She drank in the light she thought she might never see again, drank in the playful gentleness of his features.

Castle leaned into her touch and covered her hand with his own. He pulled back and kissed her palm before linking their fingers together. She held tight as they entered the main room, turning brighter shades of pink as conversation died out and all attention turned towards them. They stepped in amongst the small group of family and friends. The activity re-started immediately, the congratulations pouring in with the hugs and well wishes. Through it all, she could feel his attention on her, no matter if they stood side by side or a room apart. He sought her out for a quick dance, despite the limited space.

He held her close as the music started, sweeping her in a tight circle in the center of the room, his bandaged hand cradling hers. She rested her head on his shoulder, the room melting away under the warmth of his frame. He leaned down next to her ear and whispered gentle words of love, his breath tickling the fine hairs at her neck. She shivered and she felt the silent rumble of a chuckle in his chest. She closed her eyes as the weight of his head rested beside hers and she continued to drink in all that was him, her fiancé, her soon to be husband.

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**A/N: **Well this be my final author's note for this tale, so I shall make it as good as I can. I really and truly want to say thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, followed, or favorited this story. I have read each and every comment and felt humbled by the amount of readers who have enjoyed this story. And, I want to thank Dmarx once more for agreeing to be my beta and looking this little tale over for me.

When I first conceived of this tale, I never expected it to gain this much attention. It started out as simple idea for a one shot entitled "A Bittersweet Proposal," but, as I thought about the story more and more my mind wanted to explore the questions raised by the initial scenario and thus _Bittersweet_ was born.

Again, thank you to all

Until my next tale. Happy Reading :)


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